"Something More (Augustine's Confession)"

Augustine Just woke up with a broken heart
All this time
He's never been awake before

At thirty-one His whole world is a question mark
All this time
He's never been awake before

Watching dreams that heonce had Feed the flame inside his head
In a quiet desperation of theemptiness he says...

"There's got to be something more Than what I'm living for
I'm crying out to You"

Augustine All hisfearskeep falling out All thistime He's never been awake before

Finding now His old dreams aren't panning out
All thistime
He's never been awake before

But he's mad to be alive
And he's dying to be met
In a quiet desperation of theemptiness he says...

"Hey, I give it all away
Nothing I was holding back remains Hey, I give it all away
Looking for the grace of God today"

Todd Eby fires

For those if you that have never experienced a Todd Eby fire, you are missing a great experience.

Imagine your typical campfire, and multiply it by about 50. Standing with in 10 feet of one usually is taking your life into your hands.

Not only is the fire great, you have to have a great location. Being away from the road, back in a woods, by a creek also helps. Basically it is far enough away from your normal surroundings helps in creating the atmosphere.

Lastly, the company you are with is important and the most vital ingredient. There is something about being around friends in which you can laugh, have serious conversations, and partake in community.

Community. It seems to me that as Christians, we put way too much emphasis on the building that community takes place rather than just "doing life together" no matter where it is taking place.

Maybe we need to be less focused on looking like we are spiritual, and just being honest with each other. The more we do and worry the less about keeping up appearances, maybe the more we can see each other for who we are and strive to correct each other, encourage each other, and strive more and more to be like Christ.

Photography fun

Last year, I took some pictures at the Elkhart County 4-h Fair. I was intrigued by the chance to take some very cool pics at night. This last Tuesday night, I did it again. Here are the results.
(Granted some pics may not be the best, but I hate deleting pics.)

Giving up on sports.

Something is changing in me. Maybe it is just a new season I'm entering, but for now I'm done. I'm done with sports.

Let me clarify... I'm done living my life in a way that consumes me with if "my team" wins or loses, or whether I can rub in it that other people's teams lose. I find no more entertainment or satisfaction in it.

This sentiment started developing before I went to Kenya, but has been solidified as I have tried to figure out how to live my life as a result of what I seen, what I experienced in Kenya. Tears well up as I sit here just thinking of the little ones in Mathare who have, and in Ngata at the Baby Centre, who have been abandoned by their parents, have near nothing... and I'm going to care whether sports teams win or lose?

Naked Grandma

Like Elvis and his mom...

Less than nine hours until I am ...gone, leaving for Kenya.

I'm so freaking excited.

I'm looking forward to...
getting away from facebook and twitter (once I'm in the plane)
no trash talk or gloating about sports teams
no political ads and people complaining about political ads (I voted two Tuesdays ago)
getting away from here
getting out of my comfort zone
getting into another part of the world
spending time with the children in Mathare
meeting the people and the babies at the baby center
hearing God in a loud booming voice because all of my distractions will be thousands of miles away.

As it seems with every trip I go on, I am up way too late and am nowhere near packed. Time to get some sleep.

Almost drowning

I am in water deeper than my head, and I feel like I can't doggy-paddle any more.

Work.
Planning events.
Life.
Bills.
Student loans
Attempting to raise support for the trip.
Preparing for the trip.
I leave for Kenya in less than nine days.

I am almost drowning in everything.

I am so unqualified, so not prepared for this. I have to fight the natural urge to want to shutdown, to disconnect.

I am tired.

I need rest.

Matthew 11: 28-30 sounds really good right now: ²⁸"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

It is time to slow down, time to rest.

It is time to float for a while.